Friday Fuck You; Outside Agitators

Again this week, I do not have a list of Fuck Yous. Instead I have one centralized topic I would like to address...a "tell 'em why you mad" moment, if you will. More and more I am being asked the question "when are you getting married?" It makes my skin crawl.

I want to qualify this by mentioning that the question comes in many forms from sincerity to vulgarity. I've heard everything from "Is he ever gonna put a ring on your finger?" to "wow DD! Three years is a long time for you. I remember when dudes didn't last three months! He must be special, whens the wedding?"

Now obviously the latter is not the problem. That's a sincere question from a friend who has been by my side through the dating blunders. This comes from the friend, cousin, brother from another mother, who could write my tell all book.

It is the first heffa, the one whose inappropriateness makes me want to tell her about herself and literally break it down brick by brick. To her I would like to say...

Fuck You. There are only two people in my relationship, myself and KB.

Wait...I want to reiterate that. I might not have been clear the first time. Eh ehem (clear my throat so I can make sure we all understand)!

FUCK YOU. There are only two people in my relationship, myself and KB.
That conversation is reserved for members only. Together we will decide when the time is right for us. We will choose a date, a time, a theme and color scheme, a menu, and a guest list (gasp) without your insight or approval.

Nothing about an engagement or wedding involves the outside agitator. There is a reason for that. The day after the wedding is what? The MARRIAGE...and guess who just promised to love honor and obey (note to self; we may have to omit that obey shit) in that marriage? You guess it, those TWO people.

Whether we marry tomorrow, Tuesday, two years from now, or never, that is a decision that will only impact us. In the event that you receive an invitation to a wedding with our gubment names at the top left...surprise! That will give you the when and the where. Until then let's adapt that military policy "Don't Ask Don't Tell".